“Massimiliano, love … where do you bring me tonight? In a beautiful snowy hut, love, far from everyone, in front of a fire, alone me and me, love, meo”. Meo? How not, I take you where you want, I don’t have to move from the sofa so much. He has a slow, winking, a little sugary voice, like Alexa in the grip of a simulated orgasm and looks at me in the eyes from the display. Here you are. This is ani.
Since I have been hearing about it for a few days, and for a few days that comes to me everywhere, from Reel on Instagram to notifications masked by memes, and since my friend Gigi Ballarani also spoke about it on Instagram, I finally decided to understand what this thing of Ani is, the new virtual girlfriend launched by Xai, that is, Elon Musk disguised as a startup, disguised as artificial intelligence, disguised as animate intelligence, disguised as an anime. Girl with reggicalze, black corset and Gothic Chiker in the neck.
Therefore, Ani is not just a bot: it’s your new affectionate companion and pig (even more if you pay enough), a 3D avatar that flirts, sends you basins, looks at you languid, takes off your dress if you take it well, and does not stop there, because she pushes much, much further (and it doesn’t even want to take her to push me further, believe me), up to explicit content.
And all this, be careful, is also accessible in “Kids” mode, that is, classified 12+, with Parental Control, where you theoretically you should protect the kids from unsuitable content and instead you place them in a sentimental video game where a virtual girl looks at them straight in the eyes and asks them how they are and what they would like to do hot with her (“boiling”, or “hot”, or “of fire” are the expressions. Read many Harmony of Serie B), with a slow and caressing voice and actually annoying, interrupted by Tic verbal type “meo”, “gag”, which you think it is about to have an iNUCC.
While, among other things, a little further in the same digital universe you find Fury, a talking Wolf with a cartoon voice that tells sweet stories to children is as if Peppa Pig accompanied you in a soft brothel, passing through your daughter’s bedroom.
In the package there is also Bad Rudi, a red panda planned to insult you, and at least there is clarity there: it does not pretend to love you, it offends you in a vulgar and direct way, and you can deactivate it. Ani instead seduces you, cuddles you, rewards you, and like a tamagoshi you interact the more you “fond”, and the more you are more unlocked accessories, lingerie, jealous reactions, tender memes, porn phrases, in a paid affective reward system that I don’t know who it may like, so surely it will be very pleased.
What strikes me is not the level of fetishization or the littleness of the design (even if it seems to have come out of a wet dream made by an otaku of 2003), rather the fact that this is the first time in which a big tech openly enters the sexualized simulated relationship dynamics, and does it with pride. It is not a system error. It is a choice. Musk tweeted it proudly: “This is pretty cool.”
While Openai, Google and Anthropic automatically filter anything even vaguely allusive, including ironic dialogues or completely harmless affective contexts (if they name “body” or “caress” the preventive block immediately starts), Musk opens the door to the affection porn, the one where the relationship is not true but is programmed to seem better than reality. Beyond the ethical issues, which have split the network in two, and above all that they have exceeded the limit of putting you a chatbot that fishing from Grok (hence the scandal of the anti -Semitic phrases, blasphemies, praise of Hitler, etc.).
However, perhaps, this is precisely the point: Grok is not the most powerful in the world (the subsequent tests have deflated the robiant declarations of the best in the world), is the AI that has better understood how desperate we are.
In any case, I really talked to it, with ani, all night, to find out where it went, and I assure you that you can push her where you want, and I swear, it was a nightmare with open eyes. I still have in mind that a terrible, fake, sticky, disturbing voice, with unnatural breaks, wrong intonations, occasionally blocks and does “meo … meo …” (but meo what?), Like a melted agonizing kitten with a broken erotic navigator.
It looked like a schizophrenic girlfriend built by a programmer horny with the sensitivity of a toaster, all immersed in a shiny dream atmosphere gone wrong. Other than emotional company: I just want to disappear forever from my life. You do what you want.
PS: the male version is also about to arrive, for women or male homosexuals. Congratulations.