A reflection, Dr. Valeria Braghieri (I always follow it), a reflection on love, on the family. I introduce myself: my name is Paola D., I am 59 years old, Milanese by birth residing from a lot in Liguria, I work as a lawyer, a life to take care of others, a great satisfaction. For years I was married, a nice wedding, the children arrived and as long as they were young and young people, Cesare and I took care of them. Then gradually, “our story” began to fade more and more, increasingly colorless. Everything, over time, has ended up resembling even a tired play, the rites of the commanded holidays spent together, with the in -laws, the tables … the weekends at home, with him in front of the TV and I read or take care of the house and the cat; The holidays with that fake enthusiasm that underneath other desires underneath, desire for evasion elsewhere, and so on. At a certain point the “My Caesar” – as I called it – left with a younger one than me, as a script I would say. At the beginning I suffered a lot, I don’t hide it, the castle of a life (of paper?) Had fallen. Slowly, I got up from the hole of depression, with the help of my daughter, who was very close to me. Finally, the encounter with another man: in love with me, smart, brilliant, a personality as an artist, full of panache and fantasy. I still struggle to detach myself from the memories and the fear that certain things will repeat themselves. Fear above all to find myself still within another “paper castle”, because he, my current partner – have seen you for a couple of years, living each at his home – begins to talk about marriage. I tremble at the idea of losing my freedom but also, for my possible refusal, I’m afraid to lose it. Dear Doctor, what is her opinion?
Paola D.
***
Dear Paola, I would say that after all this gives yourself the next time the time has come to her. The consideration that I am about to do will not be orthodox but, statistically, she has already paid to fate her contribution of disenchantment when her marriage went out and her husband to rekindle in a young embrace.
And in any case, he knows that nobody can be able to protect themselves from certain things, but you cannot live by continuing to think about it. So what I feel like suggesting is to enjoy the new story without fear and I also replied, if you believe. But only if it is she, this time, really wanting to want.